Had lunch at some seafood place with grandmother and cousins on Sunday. It was an average meal but rather cheap. I would go back there for the claypot vermicelli which was as good as East Ocean's and half the price. I've been driving everywhere now hahaha I think I'm quite a dangerous driver because my foot finds the accelerator far too easily and sometimes I start daydreaming or singing along to the songs on the radio and forget to pay attention to the road oops.

Continued painting yesterday because I seriously had nothing to do. I'm rotting at home! :( :( Watched BBT and downloaded New Girl. Judging by the lack of meaningful activities in my life, I'll probably finish watching everything by the end of this week. I have also been learning how to be a good housewife one step at a time. I can now cook fish porridge #achievementunlocked

Today I met Amelia at Food For Thought at the Botanic Gardens! Drove there 'cos Mommy was going to Orchard hehe. I got lost in the Botanic Gardens again T_T Anyway I had an awesome time catching up with her and I can't wait for law school to start 'cos I'll have a friend (if she doesn't make more awesome friends during law camp hahah). It's funny how I can talk so much to her even though we hardly have any common friends.... I just feel comfortable sharing a lot of stuff with her and I think we're of the same (blonde) frequency. Took a random bus from Gleneagles to Orchard, got off at the wrong stop and had to walk a distance before reaching the correct bus stop :( I really need to get a sense of direction. Any sellers?

Anyway I'm quite sad that I'll be missing the tea session + law camp because I'm in Europe. Sure, I'll have lots of fun visiting countries I've never been to before, but I'll be missing out on so much :( What if school starts and everyone has friends except me?!?! I can't imagine being a loner omg I will be damn sad I cannot survive university without any friends. AND I WILL BE STUCK AT THE BUKIT TIMAH CAMPUS, ISOLATED FROM ALL MY HIGH SCHOOL FRIENDS :( :( :( truly an emo nemo now. I hope there will be people who like me. Sigh I guess I'm just really insecure and I want to start this new chapter of my life on the right foot.

Went for Mindy's choir concert at NYGH. I was stunned by how many girls there were in the school. How can one survive 4 years surrounded by so much estrogen and PMS???!?!!! And wtf when I walked past this whole gaggle of girls there was this disgusting nauseating smell of body odour emanating from some of them. How is this possible?!?!!??! You're girls omg please look after your personal hygiene. Apart from that, NYGH auditorium is super nice and their choir is really good compared to our school's hahah. They sang so many songs!!!! Our school choir only knows "Rehab" and "Battle of Jericho" HAHAHAH

Supposed to drive to meet Mariel tomorrow but my dad doesn't want me to drive 'cos he's scared I'll get into an accident >:( I am offended because although I am far from Mr Good-Road-User, I think I am a safer driver compared to him (honestly, take his car once and lose a few years of your life) and I don't know when they'll allow me to drive alone if they're always gonna be scared that I'll crash the car. I understand they're concerned but srsly sometimes i think my parents don't know when to let go ughhh. I also hate it when they question me about everything. "Hey Mom I'm going out." "WHERE WHAT TIME WITH WHO WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO EAT WHAT TIME ARE YOU COMING BACK WHAT ARE YOU WEARING ETC ETC" zz I think I'm just extremely moody and frustrated now. I am going to have a talk with them if this continues when university starts.

In other news, yay Danielle has whatsapp. The messages function of my phone has now been rendered obsolete.

SOPHIE YOU GOTTA UP YOUR GAME LAURA IS TRASHING YOUR BRITISH ASS.

Painted for 6 hours on Thursday and I'm not even half done! Shall continue on Monday :D Somehow it's just really stress-relieving to keep on painting and painting and lose track of time. Considering I have a shitload of time on my hands. I need to find more hobbies! I still have one blank canvas so that should keep me busy for the next week or so.

Have been putting off doing my Europe itinerary.... I've booked so many things already and it's stressing me out 'cos none of us have been to Greece before and I don't wanna get lost! I've made reservations for a Greek restaurant with an amazing view of the Acropolis, a day tour in a private taxi that'll bring us to the Temple of Poseidon where we'll have dinner and see the sunset, taxi transfer for Santorini, skip-the-line tickets for St. Mark's Basilica, dinner at Maze by Gordon Ramsay and Matilda the Musical tickets. OH SHIT AFTERNOON TEA. Sighhh so many things to do I can't believe I'm flying off in 2 weeks :O

Drove to Orchard yesterday! I've been driving quite frequently, with my mom next to me, of course. It's quite stressful 'cos my mom keeps correcting my mistakes and telling me to do things that I already know -_- I know she's concerned but I don't like people to talk to me when I'm driving! It's like Frankie HAHAH. Anyway I HIT THE KERB WHEN STOPPING AT THE ROADSIDE NEAR ISETAN SCOTTS HAHAHAH dangerousdriver93. I bought No Rest For The Dead, my paper palette 'cos I'm lazy to clean the normal palette, a skirt and a dress! I've been spending too much money zz. Met Danielle and had lunch at this pizza place at Ion Basement that was surprisingly nice! Had a very nice talk with her hehe. Then we went to watch Dark Shadows, which is an above-average film, but not one of my favorite Tim Burton movies. I guess it was more normal than the rest? And like, some parts were slightly draggy but overall it was still quite funny and slightly scary.

Anyway... I've finally made a decision regarding university...

I considered a lot of factors and really had quite a few sleepless nights over this. I did tables and graphs but none of them seemed to work because there were too many unknown variables in the equation. But then I realized the reason I applied to UK schools in the first place was as a back-up in case I didn't get Singapore. I only started having second thoughts about remaining here after I found out I got NUS and after I found out Debra was going to the UK (so that meant a friend over there!). I guess it's true that the grass is always greener on the other side because prior to getting NUS I would have killed done unscrupulous things for a spot there.

The main reasons why I want NUS are: 1. Proximity to home - I dread the idea of being in a foreign land all by myself and having to rely solely on myself. 2. Cost - UK is bloody expensive. 3. Most of my friends are here. I know the third reason is a really silly one and it shouldn't be something I hold so dear to me, since we'll probably drift apart and my future is more important than that. But I just can't ignore this factor... Sigh I should be more pragmatic eh? I suppose in terms of job opportunities, a UCL degree would be more attractive to international firms, but that once again depends on what I wish to do when I graduate and I haven't thought of that yet. I'm also not certain that I would get a first class honours in UCL, which is a huge drawback because I don't wanna be wasting 200k and coming back with a shit degree. I think studying in NUS would give me a wider network in terms of Singaporean lawyers and firms, which is fine 'cos I don't intend to migrate overseas. And NUS has exchange programs so I guess I can still spend a year abroad and see what it's like. Besides, there's always post-graduate studies if I'm that desperate for an overseas experience.

My greatest fear is that I'll regret this decision, much like how I sometimes regret not going to Raffles. But every decision has its pros and cons and I think I'll turn out fine regardless of the choice I make. Now that I've already accepted the offer, there's nothing else I can do except forge forward. I promise I'll try my best not to look back and have any regrets or 'what ifs'.

Anyway, Trang if you happen to see this, thanks for the advice you indirectly gave me through Danielle! I think it sort of helped me make a decision as well.

Yay going out now busygirl93

Now that I've gotten everything I wanted I'm not sure if I really want what I used to think I wanted.

Does that make sense?

Also, what I want might not be the best for me. The more I think about it the more pros there are to an overseas education........ I don't want to be just another average person in NUS. And living overseas would make me more independent. Would I want to be stuck in tiny Singapore for the rest of my life? I should go out and see the world..... but I'm unwilling to leave so much behind.

I think I'll mull over it during the weekend. Trying to avoid thinking about this issue because it just ruins my mood. Hate decision making but I've gotta do it within the next 2 weeks. Time to do a proper pros and cons calculation.

I think I live too much in the present and not enough in the future. And I always have such unrealistic expectations.

I don't want to make a decision and end up regretting it for the rest of my life.

Tomorrow I shall paint for the whole day and just relax. Hopefully a solution will present itself.

Oh who am I kidding I'll have to come face to face with this problem soon... just not tomorrow.

In other frivolous news I bought 1 knit top and 2 dresses today! And new paint hehe

I'm so happyyyyyy this is like 3.5 times more happiness than what I felt when passing my grade 8 exam! Sigh I don't know what I did in my previous life to deserve this, but thank you thank you thank you! To whichever unknown entity up there who's been answering all my unaddressed prayers, I'm so thankful T_T I'm so blessed I got everything I wanted and I have everything I want (well, almost everything but one shouldn't be greedy). I've been grinning like an idiot for the past 2 hours and I've been unable to wipe this silly smile off my face. Life is going so smoothly I hope it continues this way ~

Okay let me begin from this morning! Woke up at 7.15am because I had really weird dreams.... Lazed around at home surfing the internet until it was time to go to BBDC for my driving lesson! My lesson went fine even though I got 18 points for my mock test HAHAHA I almost knocked down an old man crossing the road when I was returning to BBDC. IN MY DEFENSE HE WAS JAYWALKING. Chilled until it was time for my warm-up... DUM DUM DUM DURING WARM UP I MOUNTED KERB FOR CRANK COURSE. Hahah my legs were jelly by then and I was freaking out 'cos I haven't really had any problems with my circuit recently... and the instructor didn't let me repeat the crank course. Waited for like, 45 minutes before my name was called by the instructor. Before that I was chillin' at the lobby (actually I was this close to a nervous breakdown) and thankfully Belinda was there to calm me down haha.

I think I was pretty lucky to get a nice tester. He was talking to me during the test to calm me down and he wasn't that strict? Thankfully I didn't commit any major mistakes (the worst was probably unnecessary stopping when I was turning right 'cos he was talking to me and I was distracted haha). After my crank course I was pretty chill and just treated it like a normal lesson :P It also helped that I got a really easy test route, and the weather and traffic were really good!!!!

Watched the video after that and applied for my driver's license. Was super happy 'cos I didn't really expect to pass :D (I know, I should really have more confidence in myself T_T) Drove home after that haha it was a really stressful 10 minutes Mommy kept overreacting at EVERYTHING. Damn difficult to drive with her next to you hahaha I totally understand how my dad feels now.

Anyway when we reached home there was this buzz on Twitter about NUS results being out, so I logged in to the Joint Admissions Portal to check it out. TBH I didn't expect anything 'cos this morning they were saying on the NUS Law forum that the results were out and I didn't get anything on my NUS portal... But no harm trying so I logged in... and I managed to get in i.e. I was accepted into something and since I only applied to law in NUS.... DUM DUM DUM I GOT MY FIRST CHOICE :D :D :D Shit I couldn't believe it at first then I just whooped really loudly and ran out of the room screaming "I got NUS I got NUS!"

OK I wanna thank everyone who's had faith in me and told me that I'd get it. I'm sorry if I told you to stop pressuring me and if I annoyed you by always saying that I wouldn't make it. Thank you friends and family, you've all given me so much support, encouragement and love (MUSHINESS OVERLOAD). I should really learn to believe in my abilities more :*) (yes I know I said the same thing when I got UCL -_-) To prove that my anxiety and disappointment after the interview were not unwarranted, I shall walk you through the entire process.

I had two interviewers, one male one female, and the female professor is gonna be the vice dean of academic affairs come June 2012 T_T They were all quite smiley at the beginning, and the male professor (k let's abbreviate as MP and FP) asked me why I applied for double degree in law+econs and law+life sciences, since econs and life sciences are quite different. I crapped out some answer like how I'm interested in these two subjects, but not enough to want to do them as a career. This part was okay 'cos I anticipated this question and prepared for it. Then FP read through the short write-up about myself that I had to do, and asked me about my internship at LAB. So I said it was really interesting and I got to see a lot of less fortunate people and do more work as compared to in a private firm. FP asked me if I saw a lot of family law cases and I said yes, LAB dealt mostly with divorces. MP asked which divorces were most common and I said "those where the wife is foreign and she runs away" I KNOW, I KNOW but I totally blanked out at this point and I couldn't think properly.

Then they dived into the actual thinking questions. FP asked me about pre-nuptial agreements and whether they should be legally binding, and under what circumstances can one back out of a pre-nup. I was damn stunned here 'cos I never ever dealt with pre-nups at all and my only knowledge regarding pre-nups would be the ones celebrities sign before they get married. So I said as much, and FP said "never mind, just tell me whether you think." So I said that pre-nups are recognized in the States but not in SG, and that you can back out of it if there's a change in circumstances, like if the wife gave birth and stayed at home to look after the kids, quitting her job in the process. I linked it to the rationale behind the variation of a court order. At this point, I was still pretty pleased that I managed to come up with this answer given that it had taken me by surprise. I thought it was rather logical.

Then MP asked me about legal issues that existed in science now... (why oh why did I put life sciences as my second choice T_T) I spouted out bioethics, the most predictable answer ever, before I could stop myself. On hindsight I should've said something like patents. I talked about animal experimentation and Desmond's biology ARP (thanks for always going on and on about it HAHA) and how some people might not be okay with harming animals. MP asked "where do you think you should draw the line in experimentation? Is experimentation on animals okay?" Then I just said yeah I didn't see any problem with that, so long as there's enough promise in a research project since it will benefit society in general. And stoned 'cos I think they were expecting a longer answer hahah but I seriously don't see the need to justify it 'cos it's obviously beneficial. MP then asked "what about experimentation on fetuses and women donating their eggs for research" so I said "I would donate my eggs for research 'cos it doesn't harm anyone." Cue cricket noises and awkward silence again. Once again, they asked me "Where do you draw the line? Is it 100% okay to experiment on fetuses?" 'Where do you draw the line' seems to be their favorite phrase. This part I screwed up bad. I said the line should be drawn when the brain and nervous system develops fully 'cos that's when the fetus can feel pain (actually I don't even know if that's true 'cos my bio sucks) then I said... THE NOTOCHORD DEVELOPS AT WEEK 5. DAFUQ CHERYL WHY SO RANDOM??? So they assumed that I meant you can only experiment on fetuses up till 5 weeks even though I was just trying to sound intelligent and knowledgable hahahah #loser. Then I mentioned I think the line should be drawn at the second trimester, 'cos that's when Singapore bans abortion also so there must be some sort of rationale behind it. And FP went, "5 weeks and 2nd trimester are very far apart." So I had to quickly clarify that I was just stating a random fact and I wasn't sure when the nervous system was fully developed and I would assume that the 2nd trimester was a good approximation, but FP didn't seem to buy it and MP told FP "So she changed her stance." OMG AT THAT POINT I WAS SO HORRIFIED I WANTED TO CRY 'COS THE #1 RULE IS TO DEFEND YOUR STAND TILL DEATH. Then MP said "Good, that's all. Thank you!"

But anyway, despite all this (and 2 weeks of trepidation) I got my double degree in the end! I'm so appreciative of this opportunity given to me and I swear I'll treasure it (as soon as I talk to APU tomorrow). My life is great!!!!!

I think humans are never satisfied with the way they look. I don't think I'm ugly (I think???) but I dislike my nose and huge jaw and eyebags and my face is too big and fat. And this is just for the face hahaha. I think I need to stop being so superficial and start focusing on the more important things in life!

Had a great Friday and Saturday but I'm so exhausted now I think I'll stay at home for a while.. until Dark Shadows & Safe come out, Danielle wanna catch either one of them? :D

Woke up at 730 (!!!) on Friday and bused to Vivo with Danielle. I love staying right next to her she's my bus buddy hahaha. Then we either have lots of HTHT on the bus/ play Scramble. I hope no one tunes in to our conversation like I did to that Indian guy last week trololol major embarrassing. Met Debz John Htoo then we walked to USS!

Took BSG first then Mummy and Jurassic Park, super proud of Danielle for being so brave and just chionging all the rides with us!!!! Time to go overseas with friends to Gold Coast - I really wanna do this hehe okay I swear within the next 2 years I will go overseas with friends to a theme park. We took the Transformers simulator as well and it was much better than expected (because I really wasn't expecting anything) but I thought it was quite realistic hahah. Took the Madagascar carousel and felt nauseated #loser Took lots of pictures with the characters and had a giant pizza om nom nom. Watched Monsters Rock and Donkey Live and Shrek 4D, I think by 5pm we were pretty knackered so we just stoned in some eatery.

Oh, and I got a pretty bad impression of some tourists because they kept on pushing and cutting the queue. Like, okay I get it that's the custom back in your home country but you shouldn't do that when you're overseas because it's just off-putting. I was queuing up for ice cream then this bitch just popped up out of nowhere and shoved 3 $1 coins onto the counter and shouted out her order. RELAX LA THE ICE CREAM WON'T RUN AWAY. Then when I turned out l'horreur there was a whole hoarde of them just crowded around omg total chaos now I understand why they have traffic jams and infrastructure problems. This is one of the main reasons why I dislike USS.

But enough complaining, here're some pictures!

Took BSG right before it closed, I really love the view in the evening, the sky is really pretty :) Headed to Toast Box for dinner. Curry chicken + barley for $6.20 hahaha not bad for a place that likes to rip people off. Went for After Hours to watch the fireworks. They're so prettyyyy. I always feel awed whenever I see fireworks, no matter how crowded the place is. I just feel really peaceful watching the chemicals and fuels explode in the air.

Saturday was Avengers + Sentosa day! Met Danielle again (HAVE I MENTIONED HOW AWESOME IT IS TO LIVE NEXT TO EACH OTHER?) and bused to Marina Square. Read this random quote off some advertisement "Love is like waiting for the bus, it never comes when you want it to." and then Danielle was like, "no what the bus came almost immediately". Point taken hahaha. Walked around Marina Square 'cos we were the earliest (yay us!) and bought... MATCHING SANDALS. I remember in school we were always saying 'let's get matching canvas shoes and draw on them' so I guess this is a good enough substitute hahah.

Met Debra and John and we went to watch the Avengers!!!! :) IT WAS A NICE MOVIE HEHEHE I think Black Widow, Iron Man and Hulk are super cool omggg. I loved all of Iron Man's lines they were so witty omg Pepper Potts is a lucky woman. And the trading card part was super sad omg :( I liked how Black Widow wasn't some loser woman who needed to be saved 'cos she could stand her own ground. And the part when the Hulk flung Loki around was so funny :D And I didn't feel bored 'cos of the action overload/ 'cos the movie was over 2 hours long! Can't wait for the next Marvel movie!

Walked to Raffles City after that and they grabbed random bites. Hahah I just realized I had nachos for lunch and a cookie for dinner yesterday :O Then headed to Vivo with Debz + John and went to Sentosa with John. Sneaked past the queue for the monorail #superspy It was a longggg journey to Tanjong Beach. Met the rest there and just lazed around on Belinda's mat and caught up with some people. I think I spent less than 2 hours in Sentosa -_-

They went to Vivo to have dinner at Subway, ah I hate the stench of that accursed place. We were all split up so I talked to Stanley and Debra (who joined us after her shopping tsk tsk). Stanley is damn full of nonsense hahah eating a snake as part of the commando course wtf. Was super shagged so I went back at 7+ and just lazed around at home till 130am I'm a night owl!!!!!!!!!

Yay gonna have buffet later with my grandma as an early Mothers' Day celebration! I love my grandma.

Okay I need to stop posting frivolous stuff and start being more intellectual else when I read this 5 years from now I'll be like DAFUQ CHERYL YOU BIMBO

5 weeks is an awfully long time :(

Sigh I'm a disgusting slug :( Self-loathing ability is functioning at maximum capacity at the moment.

My sister's being an annoying cow, throwing a tantrum because I insisted we had Matilda at home and asked her why she bought it again. I swear to God I'm gonna find that bloody book and make Miss Know-it-all eat her words. I hate it when people think I'm wrong when I'm not. I've read Matilda countless times as a child you'd think I would know whether we had the bleeding book at home or not.

Driving today was okay. I chionged towards this asshole motorcyclist who dashed out onto the circuit road even though I had the right of way. Instructor had to jam brake hahaha. Okay I should take this more seriously.

Yesterday I swam for the first time since Chinese New Year hahahahaha my parents keep bugging me to exercise I hate exercising. Why bother when we're all gonna die anyway. And I have fat genes so regardless of how many miles I run everyday I'm still gonna balloon so why make myself miserable for nothing? #cheryl'sbrandoflogic

Hm watched Mirror Mirror with Danielle on Friday I really liked the show!!! Super funny and sweet hahaha Lily Collins is freaking pretty omggg. I liked all the characters except for Snow White hahah. It was so weird when she did this evil thing at the end of the movie when she said "age before beauty" and offered the poisoned apple (I assume it's poisoned) to the queen........ The credits scene was HILARIOUS I laughed myself silly. Can check it out below if you're bored hehe

I can't wait for tomorrow!!!!!!!!! Gonna be a fun day just hanging out with friends and getting away from this stifling judgmental environment at home. I hope we watch Avengers on Saturday! Feel like a slowpoke 'cos everyone has watched it already :(

Oh no soon the few remaining male friends I have who're still free from the entrapments of duty to nation will be kidnapped by the evil NS monster :(

Was on 961 with Danielle on Thursday and we overheard this Indian dude telling his friend this:

"I don't want a girlfriend now. But during orientation, I talked to all the girls. I flirted with all of them, I smile smile at all of them. And I asked if they had a boyfriend and they all said no. You know in that kind of way where they say it nicely so you know they're interested in you? But I didn't want a girlfriend 'cos I just broke up with (insert Indian girl's name)."

Went to Cleo's house on Saturday after driving. We had lunch at Relish first, I tried their Bangers and Mash, it was not bad but the portion was pathetic :( We also shared a Sangria and I shared the mushroom soup with Desmond. I quite liked the soup! And they were nice enough to split it into 2 bowls for us :D I bought bandung cupcakes from The Cupcake Engineer after that. It's super ex though T_T Cleo's house is super huge hahaha. Our attempt to play table tennis failed miserably so we ended up playing word games and snacking. We also played an improvised version of Pictionary hahaha Yihui and Desmond don't make a very good Pictionary team!

Watched Cabin in the Woods on Tuesday. It's quite an interesting movie... wasn't as bad as expected and I found it quite funny! "Make out with a moose." "Dude that's a wolf." Hahahah the pothead is damn funny. Had Ben&Jerry's I'm so unhealthy hehehe. I dunno why I no longer like creamy ice creams (lol sounds funny) I like le sorbet hehehe.

I've been having chest pains since Saturday morning and this morning it was really really bad. Prior to today, the chest pains were intermittent but today it was continuous and I couldn't even walk from the MRT to the office without resting. It's one of the worst pains I've ever experienced and I have a relatively high pain threshold. I was quite scared 'cos normally my chest pains last 3 minutes max and I had a tingling feeling at my left shoulder so I was like wtf am I having a heart attack hahaha. Anyway I went to see the doctor just now and he said I have an inflamed rib muscle wtf. Damn anticlimatic right hahaha. He gave me anti-inflammatory medicine and other shit. I hope it goes away soon sleep doesn't come easy when your chest feels like it's gonna explode.

SMU interview tomorrow sighhh. I'm really shit at interviews the last interview I had before university applications was RGS DSA INTERVIEW 7 YEARS AGO :( Feel so disadvantaged when I look at the other applicants oh man.

Mariel's going to Europe in 3 hours' time I'm gonna miss her :-)

I shall relook at my Rome and Venice hotels I dread sharing a room with my parents no matter how large the room is. My dad snores like Godzilla.

I have rashes they are very itchy